So, Who are the Real Barbarians?

image by Zuma Press

I am a Peace Corps Volunteer serving in Kyrgyzstan, a small Central Asian republic with a rich and ancient cultural history. Two years ago, when I learned that I would be serving in Kyrgyzstan, I began learning about this beautiful, fascinating country. One of the things that I quickly learned is that the practice of bride kidnapping, while illegal, still persists in Kyrgyzstan. My initial thought was: How can such a barbaric practice continue in the modern world?

During my service, I have learned more about bride kidnapping. Some “kidnappings” are consensual, planned by both the bride and groom. In most cases, the kidnapped woman is taken to the home of her kidnapper, where the women in the kidnapper’s family place a white veil on the head of the kidnapped woman and try to persuade her to marry her kidnapper. If she keeps the veil on, she is deemed to have consented to the marriage. Some kidnapped woman who refuse marriage are allowed to leave without marrying. I don’t mean to diminish the horror of true bride kidnappings, where women are violently taken and forced to marry against their wills, which still occur in Kygyzstan, but I now see that the practice is more complicated than I first realized.

In the nearly two years that I have served in Kyrgyzstan, America has suffered mass shootings, where four or more innocent people are murdered by savages in one horrific outburst of violence, on an almost weekly basis. I have read the impassioned pleas of many Americans, including those of our President, to take action to stop these senseless killings of innocents. And yet nothing has changed.

As Americans, we like to celebrate our country as a bastion of freedom and security, and, indeed, people throughout the world view America that way, and long for the lives that we enjoy. But there are deep flaws in the American character and the American way of life. Our centuries of slavery and oppression of African Americans is a wrong that has not been redressed. And our tolerance of gun violence is inexplicable, tragic, and barbaric. When we criticize other cultures, we ought to first look at our own and ask: Who are the real barbarians?